Be nice to your kids. They'll choose your nursing home. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder... 3 kinds of people: those who can count & those who can't. Why is "abbreviation" such a long word? Don't use a big word where a diminutive one will suffice. ...Every morning is the dawn of a new error... A flying saucer results when a nudist spills his coffee. For people who like peace and quiet: a phoneless cord. I can see clearly now, the brain is gone... The beatings wi...
GEORGE BUSH: When you rearrange the letters: HE BUGS GORE DORMITORY: When you rearrange the letters: DIRTY ROOM PRESBYTERIAN: When you rearrange the letters: BEST IN PRAYER DESPERATION: When you rearrange the letters: A ROPE ENDS IT THE MORSE CODE: When you rearrange the letters: HERE COME DOTS SLOT MACHINES: When you rearrange the letters: CASH LOST IN ME ANIMOSITY: When you rearrange the letters: IS NO AMITY MOTHER-IN-LAW: When you rearrange th...
Hey anyone know why i cant seem to log off from this account? my cousin has an account here and hes getting pissed that he cant log in. anyway, any help you guys give would be deeply appreciated. Ed
Resume GEORGE W. BUSH 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue Washington, DC 20520 EDUCATION AND EXPERIENCE: Law Enforcement: I was arrested in Kennebunkport, Maine, in 1976 for driving under the influence of alcohol. I pled guilty, paid a fine, and had my driver's license suspended for 30 days. My Texas driving record has been "lost" and is not available. Military: I joined the Texas Air National Guard and went AWOL. I refused to take a drug test or answer any q...
You are Form 8, Demon : The Destroyer. "And The Demon took advantage of the chaos and seized civillization. With grace and style, Demon slit The Goddess's belly and drowned the world in her blood. The Goddess, The Demon, and the world were no more." Some examples of the Demon Form are Seth (Egyptian) and The Horsemen of the Apocalypse (Christian).The Demon is associated with the concept of destruction, the number 8, and the element of earth.His sign is the full moon.As a member of ...
Just a few quotes i found in the internet. the first one's my own btw.hehehe "Drinking is such a big part of my life. When i die the first thing i'd probably do is find a bar." Edmund Falgui "All right, brain, I don't like you and you don't like me - so let's just do this and I'll get back to killing you with beer." Homer Simpson. "The difference between a drunk and a alcoholic is that a drunk doesn't have to attend all those meetings." Arthur Lewis. "The answer to life's...
Step 1: Don’t fudge your packing Resilient pests like cockroaches and Danny Bonaduce won’t be the only ones to survive an atomic apocalypse. But to have a shot, you need to prepack some gear in a handy duffel bag. “I call it a bug-out kit,” says Bruce Beach, author of You Will Survive Doomsday. “Aluminum knives, candles, small sewing kits, comfortable shoes—a wide variety of things.” (For more info, go to ki4u.com/products1.htm.) Make sure to bring a shortwave radio with a small antenna, a rech...
i My school life. hmm the best way to describe it is probably nomadic. i have been to 5 schools since kinder to highschool. i dont know why but it just seems like trouble follows me everywhere i go... or maybe its because im the one who causes all the trouble. Kinder; i was hitting my classmate with a ballon continiously when my teacher popped the ballon i was holding. in my anger i took off my shoe and threw it at my teacher. grade one; two sixth graders were bullying me. they were hitting me w...
Have you ever been in a situation where you felt like a heel. well here are a few excuses for when you meet the people you were with the other night when you were drunk. feel free to add some of your own. YOU’RE NOT A BIG FAT HOG, YOU HAVE… Lardophilia Symptoms: Steadily increasing difficulty in securing one’s trousers without an elaborate pulley system and three roadies. In extreme cases, sufferer may begin smelling like a burger to those around him/her. Treatment: Drink plenty of fluid...
We have a saying in the philippines"if you want to learn a new language start with the insults' here are a few from the world over.gonna step foot on another country? learn these few simple phrases and after a while you can insult foreingers like a native. France: Salop= bastard votre equipe football est merde= you football team is shit la ou je viens de l'inceste n'est pas encourage= where i come from incest isnt encouraged. va te tripoter= Go tinker with yourself il ya du monde au ba...
Manufacturers of consumer products have to be liberal with the warning labels these days, lest they get sued. But for these, it's hard to know whether the company is being outright stupid or if they're simply targeting the most brain dead dumb among us. check it out: These are My Favorites: "Eating rocks may lead to broken teeth." -- On a novelty rock garden set called "Popcorn Rock." "Do not recharge, put in backwards, or use." -- On a battery. "Do not use for drying pets." -- In th...
To anyone who got irritated about the multiple posts of mine, i just want you guys to know i apologize. i didnt know that clicking the submit article 6 or so times would also post it six times. i was irritated because my modem is so slow. anyway sorry again.
Hmmm... Well most people i know think im a bad ass but this is not so. im just a guy who does whatever i want to do. If i was wrong then i just accept the fact that i made a mistake.i hate a person who never takes responsibility for their mistakes, i believe them to be weak. I think that I'm as intelligent as the next person (unless that person is Einstein), Most people who thinks they know me believes that I have no goals in life. I guess to a person who doesn't know me too well this will seem ...
Men are a misunderstood lot, which all in all is probably for the best. Women are better off not knowing that we eat with our hands the minute they leave the room or that we use their nail clippers to trim our nose hair. Better for them, better for us. Still, it's annoying that women spend more time and money trying to understand the minds of cats than they do wondering about what makes men tick. Which is why they'll never understand... 1. Our consuming need to own the biggest and most expen...
Hey guys help my cousin win this contest. please vote for her here at http://www.newsandjava.com/sexycontest2004.htm .She is at second place at the moment. so vote for her, she only needs 150 votes to get the lead. heres her pic Heres My favorites: