Articles i found interesting, things that are funny for me, my beliefs, philosophy in life and other things about me.
a different kind of me.
Published on February 16, 2004 By EFalgui In Blogging
(This is what my darker side would probably be like. Its either the opposite of me or me taken to the extreme, maybe even both... or maybe just maybe this is the real me and i just didnt know it)


These are a few things I have learned throughout my life (young as I am). I learned these by common sense, experience and sometimes through observation. Trust is one of the things that I have a lot of trouble giving. Probably since I never really trusted a whole lot of people in my life.

To put your trust in someone is like offering him or her a chance to betray you. Trust is the sound of betrayal in the dark… I will always remember that line. Trust is something that I just can’t give, except to a few select people whom I have learned to trust and care for through the years of having their companionship.

Respect though is another matter. This is something that I give as long as the person deserves it as I see it. As mostly everyone knows you can respect someone without trusting him or her, yet it is impossible to trust someone without respecting him or her first.

Of course respect doesn’t automatically come, it is something a person earns from the actions that he does. For me if a person is honorable then he is someone whom I can respect. It doesn’t matter if he is an enemy or a friend. Another type of person that I can respect is one who is intelligent. I don’t know how many more reasons there are for me to have respect for someone, they are probably too many to list down so I wont even try.

To survive in the world today one must become cunning and ruthless. Crush anyone who is coming into power even before they know that they have the possibility to pull you down. If it turns out that they are already too powerful to crush then the best alternative is to try to control them, get them to trust you and then use them for your own ends. It comes easily with time and more practice.

I once believed that using people is wrong, but I realized that there are times when I have no other option but to do so. It is the same with lies. For me lies are one of the most useful types of information (when used against an enemy) you can give to someone. Though for a lie to work you have to either keep it as simple as you can or to have a whole network of people that would make it appear as truth. For me its better to keep things like a lie as simple as possible.

Lying is best kept simple. When you complicate a lie that’s when things start falling apart. The reason for this is that most people aren’t stupid. That’s why I believe that knowledge is a very powerful factor in ones life. The more you know the better you can react to all kinds of situations. Knowledge as they say is a weapon, and I want myself to be armed to the teeth in case I need it.

But don’t get me wrong knowledge isn’t everything, intuition also comes into play, especially when you don’t have enough information about what you are about to do. There are times when i just know that it is the right action to take, I never find out why, but in the end it mostly comes out the way i wanted it to. You never know what will happen after a decision until the results come in. That’s probably why I like life so much, it all so uncertain. We never know what’s coming until it gets here.

Comments
on Feb 16, 2004
My dad told me this old saying many times " If in life, you have 3 true friends, 3 people that you can trust implicitly, trust ultimately, and completely, then you are a very lucky person." The others, don't worry about them, they don't really count.
I haven't seen him proved wrong, yet.
on Feb 16, 2004
I myself have had a problem with trusting, too. But as I read your article, I come to the (ideally) obvious conclusion that it ISN'T a problem, not being able to trust. I don't think trust is a thing you should give wholly and completely to just any person. There are few out there in your network of acquaintences who are actually deserving of your trust and equally reliable. In fact, I think that trust should almost be even more sacred than love, because it's so much shadier and more difficult to discover whether one is actually deserving of trust, and it's so much harder to define and even understand it. But perhaps trust is love, and love is trust, and neither exist without the other?

~Anne
on Feb 17, 2004
i think that you have a point there, but maybe instead of using the word sacred the word we should use is important. the reason i feel that it is more important in relationships than love is because if you have no trust then how can you fully love anyone.

love though will always be the most sacred of all feelings, i have loved only a few women in my life yet even though our paths have already parted there is still that lingering love for each of them within me. even after after all the fights the arguments i will never cease to bellieve that those times i spent with each of them will always have a special place in my mind. no nothing is more sacred, more fullfilling than love.

I guess im done writing about my darker side.